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Here's the thing: the relationship between procrastination and self-belief

I don’t know anyone who hasn’t procrastinated over something at some point.

In fact, when I’m talking with clients, the subject often pings up. Those things that you know you should do, and even want to do, but just can’t quite summon the get-up-and-go to do it.

Yep, me too.

There are plenty of things that I push into the magical time called “tomorrow”. Or I sit down to write or work on a spreadsheet and I find ten thousand other things to do.

Sometimes it’s procrastinating putting the washing on. Sometimes it’s procrastinating sending the email (or even looking at emails). Sometimes it’s getting something new going. Recently, I’ve been procrastinating because of my fear of success.

And what I’ve realised is this: procrastination is all about self-belief.

But often we don’t see it that way. We tell ourselves the story that we’re lazy or that the hard thing we’re trying to do isn’t right (because it isn’t easy). We think that if we just push harder, we’ll get there. Productivity is just about slicing up time differently, right? If I put a timer on for 10 minutes, it’ll be magical, won’t it?

The answer to those questions is: sometimes. If your self-belief is almost there, then yes, tips and tricks and tools can help to get you over the hump. But if there’s a bigger deficit in your self-belief, or if you haven’t realised that that’s what’s going on, you need more than just a shove in the right direction.

Here’s the thing:

If you’re struggling with self-belief, if you’re stuck in a pattern of procrastination, ask yourself the following questions. These aren’t quick fixes, but prompts to help you target the source of your procrastination, rather than shove you out of it as quickly as possible.

What’s the ultimate goal of what you’re trying to do? It’s easy, once we’ve added something to the to-do list, to lose track of why it’s actually important. It can become just another item to tick off, rather than a really beneficial task that adds value. Take a moment to remember what your aim is, and see if that shifts the feelings around the task at hand.
What’s your fear? Let me tell you what 99% of clients say when I ask this question: failure. We’re all afraid of failure, because our culture tells us perfection (especially perfection that looks easy and effortless) is the only way. Write down what you’re afraid of, so that you can start to separate from it. Imagine turning the volume down on the fear, or gently giving it a cup of tea and a book so you can get on with things. You can’t fail at your own life.
What are your beliefs about yourself? Spend some time digging into the deeper, subconscious levels of beliefs you might be holding on to that aren’t true. Do you believe you’re allowed to be successful? Do you believe you deserve a clean kitchen or an organised social media calendar? It might be that your demons are holding you back from moving forward. Give them some air so that you can re-write the story. (And: re-writing the story is often helped by doing the thing you’re not sure you deserve yet. Show yourself you’re worthy by doing it.)
How would you help someone else feel better about this task? We’re often much gentler and kinder to other people than we are to ourselves. Imagine your best friend or daughter or even a customer was trying to do what you’re procrastinating about. What would you say to them? What gentle way in would you find for them? How would you structure a list or a project management tool for them?
How can you reward yourself when the task is done? Perhaps you’ll treat yourself to a lovely break, or a new book. Perhaps you’ll write yourself a note of appreciation. You could even ask a friend (or mentor) for accountability so that they can give you a gold star when you’re done. Maybe your reward will be the self-belief you create by doing the thing, or getting a good night’s sleep because you’re not worried as much.

When you’re stuck in procrastination, anything that promotes your self-care, that encourages you to trust yourself, is going to help. It may seem counter-intuitive, but self-belief is long-term, and needs regular tending.

For me, it’s about writing it all out, giving myself the water and fuel I need, and creating a nice atmosphere to do the work I need to do. I often think of myself as a client, and what I would want to do for them. Yes, I’d want to tidy up their kitchen and order them nice food and write things out in a pretty and achievable list. So that’s what I do for myself.

What’s helpful for you? Do you have a certain thing you’re procrastinating at the moment?

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The Big New Idea: design starts this week!

Ah, this Big New Idea continues to take up a lot of my brain space! I switch quickly between thinking big and long term to thinking small and detailed. Such is my way of working.

Here’s what I’ve been working on over the past week-and-a-bit:

Branding. After getting in touch with various designers and running into timing conflicts and fear of the unknown, I’ve come back to working with Evan at Sixteen July (who designed this site and who is awesome). She starts design work TODAY! I have, of course, created a Pinterest board of visual references. If you love that kind of thing and want to see how it will transform into a logo and brand style, check out the board here.
Schedule. I’m aiming to launch the website and the business at the beginning of July. Originally, I was thinking June, but I have other commitments (read: I’m going away for a week) that just made it unrealistic. Before the launch, I’ll be running a trial photoshoot with my team here in Cambridge so that we can practice working together, and hopefully get some awesome content to share on the website.
Pricing. I’ve been playing with the numbers to figure out what I’ll need to charge to make this work for me and my team, as well as keeping it affordable for the customer. I want tiny one-person businesses to be able to get high quality photography and copy, as well as making it accessible to bigger businesses who want to send us their entire range. I’m a big believer in getting feedback when you offer your product, so I’m only asking for feedback from a select number of clients before launch. (Rather than asking, “How much would you pay for this?”, it’s much more effective to actually put the product out there with a price tag and see how many people buy it. When people theorise about how much they’d spend on something, it isn’t always true to their behaviour.)
Team. Oh, the team. So much of the success of Big New Idea will rely on the team. I have a little mini team for our trial, which I’m really excited about, but I’m also continuing to build local connections in Cambridge, especially for photographers. (If that’s you, email me.) I’ve been thinking loads about how I can scale up the team quickly, and about the leap of faith I’ll need to make to do this. Flexibility is awesome, but I’m also going to need to offer and ask for commitment if demand is high.
Process. I’m fairly obsessed with process, and this is very much a work in progress. A real foundation for this business will be efficiency and professionalism, so I’m working on ways to get product lists, contact details, notes and shooting schedules set up to provide my team and clients with clarity. Picture big scribbly diagrams, post its, and spreadsheets as I work on this!
Trial shoot. I have a lovely bunch of clients who have offered up their products for the trial shoot, and they’ll be getting emails from me this week. I’ll be planning each shot with my team so that we’re building in quality from the start.

I’ve also been thinking about the balance of my Big New Idea with my existing business. Because mentoring clients one-on-one, running retreats, creating courses, and leading workshops is really what I want to be doing. I love it. That’s why I started my business. It’s so important to me!

But right now, I can’t do more than keep with my existing clients while I set up this business. It wouldn’t be fair (or possible) to take on new mentoring clients because I wouldn’t be able to give them my full attention. That’s a hard decision, for me. But I have some exciting plans for when the Big New Idea is off the ground to create Jenny Hyde Mentoring 2.0! So patience is the key…

This decision – to pause mentoring while I set up something new and complementary – is also tricky from a financial point of view. This month and next month won’t bring in the cash flow I usually expect and aim for, PLUS I’m spending money on a website and props and other investment stuff. “Hold your nerve” is my mantra right now. It ain’t easy.

So, that’s the update from me! If you have any questions or thoughts, I’d love to hear from you.

Jenny x

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The Big New Idea: the pendulum swing

Sooooo… It’s taken me a good two weeks to get to writing this update on my Big New Idea. Partly, there was a bank holiday and sunshine that distracted me for a bit. And partly I got totally overwhelmed by the response to my last post!

I wrote the post on a Friday afternoon, after meeting with a photographer who’s on board and excited to work on the project. It suddenly felt like there was momentum! So I woke up on Monday, read through the post and sent it out, merrily getting on with the next thing on my to do list.

I kind of forgot that I was revealing a massive piece of news, directly to the audience I hope will be my customers.

So there I am, trying to focus on getting some more stuff, you know, done, and I start getting emails, comments and direct messages from people who are excited to have a service that offers the full package of product content. Someone even asked if I could do all the “boring” bits of her business, so that she could just spend her time drawing and creating!

Let me be clear: this is totally awesome. Thank you to everyone who got in touch and felt excited! It means a lot to me and I really appreciate the support. It gave me a whole new level of momentum.

For about a day. Because this is what happened next: I did a 180 on the pendulum swing of “Is this going to work?” One day, I was worrying that starting the new content studio would take up too much of my time for not much reward. That I’d really have to drive business hard and spend a lot of time trying to fill a day a month of actual paying work. The next day, I had the opposite fear: the “oh $£!&” feeling that I might not even be able to keep up with demand – that this could take over. And do I want it to take over? What if it’s too successful?

Well. First of all, it’s kind of confusing and tiring to feel so many emotions in the space of 24 hours.

It’s also that thing that I often forget: being afraid of success. I’m going to step onto my soap box briefly here, because I want to share this with you.

In our culture, we’re primed to believe that success is always just around the corner, but never quite achievable. We’re programmed to stay small, because keeping us small means that millions of million-pound businesses can market to us based on fear. (“Buy this and it’ll make you lovable.” “If you were really successful, you’d buy this big TV.” “Don’t forget, you need to lose weight in order to be truly acceptable and successful.”)

Especially as women, we have generations of predecessors whose primary role was to support others, regardless of talent, ability and potential to lead fulfilling lives and careers. We’re still carrying those stories around, untangling them bit by bit.

And here’s what I’m trying to untangle: We’re allowed success on our own terms. Truly. But sometimes those old stories – the fear of success, of letting ourselves be seen and loved and really good at what we do – hold us back more than we realise.

Marianne Williamson puts it best:

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are more powerful beyond measure. It is light, not our darkness that frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?”

Oh boy. Let’s sit with that one for a bit, shall we?

So, yes. I’ve been trying to go with the pendulum swing, trying to accept the positive response and really take in that this big new idea, this content studio is a good idea. This is something worth pursuing, and has the potential to change my life and my business. I don’t know how or in what direction. But part of starting something new is surrendering to the journey.

As ever, I hope that sharing my thoughts and experiences as I set up something new is helpful, whether you’re starting something from scratch or looking at a new project or phase of your business.

If you have thoughts, feedback or questions, I’d love to hear from you. If the past two weeks have taught me anything, it’s that hearing from people is helpful!

And what I’ve realised is this: procrastination is all about self-belief.

Here’s the thing:

I kind of forgot that I was revealing a massive piece of news, directly to the audience I hope will be my customers.

Notes of Encouragement