small business Archives - Page 24 of 29

Here's the thing: what it's like to mentor with me

A few weeks ago, I was on a call with a client who asked whether she was using the time “correctly”, whether she was like other clients in her worries, questions, progress.

My first reaction was: it really doesn’t matter. If this is right for you, this is what we’ll talk about.

So we carried on. And then someone else asked me what it was like to mentor with other people, too. So, I figured it’s probably time to spill the beans.

This week’s blog post is an open letter to all current and future mentoring clients about what it’s like to mentor with me.

You bring lots of worries, thoughts and ideas – I listen and try to identify the most important bits.
We talk about everything – products, marketing, websites, branding, pricing, suppliers, social media, colleagues, business, family, weather, food, tea, rest, meditation, books. Everything is on the table.
We talk about feelings as well as practical stuff, and I usually add a to do list for the week which can include anything from uploading a product to researching a supplier to getting an early night. Sometimes it includes throwing out everything that was already on your to do list.
We repeat things on a week to week basis – sometimes we spend weeks talking about the same thing before it feels like we’ve made progress. This is entirely normal, and to be expected, as we realign your business practice and create new habits and ways of thinking.
Time management is always a thing – always.
I will encourage you to use (make you use) spreadsheets. Resistance is futile.
We usually end up with a shared, secret Pinterest board to share ideas for branding, photography and projects. This is one of my favourite parts of the job.
Typically, you need as much encouragement as I can fit into a call. It’s okay to need real reassurance from someone you can trust.
You can ask for what you need – nothing is off-limits to talk about, but I might point you in a different direction for better help where relevant.
I am an excellent secret-keeper. Several clients have shared news with me long before anyone else, because I’m here to help plan for change.
There will be moments of silence as I scribble down notes. I’ll ask you to repeat things, or say more about something, so that I really feel like I know what you’re worrying or thinking about.
I’ll give you options, suggestions, choices. It’s up to you to take them.

Here’s the thing

There’s no right way to run a business. Yes, some of the things I work with clients on (like getting your pricing to work for you) are business essentials. But a lot of the time, we talk through questions that are varied, multi-level and complex. The places where you can’t see the wood for the trees. I help you see the wood.

If I had one message for all my clients or anyone who feels they it, this would be it:

It’s okay to need reassurance, and it’s okay to feel like you’re stepping into the unknown. You are. And it’s amazing.

Here's the thing: take lunch breaks

In recent conversations with clients and at the Small Creative Business Retreat, it has come to my attention that many small business owners are not taking lunch breaks. In fact, some are not even eating lunch!

It’s time to change. I’m starting a lunch break revolution because, apparently, we need one.

I’m not going to argue with the wise people who tell you breakfast is the most important meal of the day. That would be foolish, I’m sure.

But lunch holds a very particular significance because it’s right there, smack bang in the middle of the day. Which makes it an ideal – nay – essential time for a proper break. You’ve put in the hours in the morning, and you brain and body are in need of sustenance, both food and time.

You know, if you actually employed yourself, you’d be legally obliged to give yourself at least 20 uninterrupted minutes for every 6 hours, plus tea and loo breaks.

Ask yourself right now: do you get 20 minutes off before you stop working in the evening?

And then ask yourself this: do you often feel overwhelmed, tired, unclear, unfocused, or unsure? If the answer is yes, let me suggest something… Take a lunch break!

Not just any kind of lunch break, a proper one. One in which your brain gets to slow down and relax a bit, or your hands get a good rest. A break that allows you to return to the land of real human beings, not a one-(wo)man business machine. A break in which you breathe, notice yourself eating nourishing food, drink something lovely, and sit quietly for a moment or two.

Things that do not constitute taking a lunch break:

Scrolling through Facebook, Pinterest or Instagram
Sitting by your computer or laptop, trying to get food in your mouth without looking
Any kind of chore, or to do list item

If you’re currently kidding yourself that spending 10 minutes on Facebook, getting worked up about what other people are doing, is actually a lunch break, then please – stop now.

Here’s the thing…

I’m going to tell you something you may find shocking. I take a lunch break every single day, for at least 30 minutes, and usually longer. I get up, make my lunch, and I sit on my sofa – 2 metres away from my laptop and phone.

Sometimes I pull out a (non-work) book. Sometimes I make notes (but only after I’ve finished eating). I breathe. I put on fun music. I stretch.

Sometimes (here it comes) I take a 2 hour lunch break. I go to yoga, or I simply need more downtime in order for my brain and my body to return to work mode. It’s taken me a little while to know that this is okay. I started off worrying that I’d need to schedule in “make up” time so that I was “allowed” to have time off. What I’ve discovered is that having a longer break when I need one allows me to work longer, or get up earlier, without me forcing it. It happens naturally. Honest.

Here’s the bit I really want you to hear: taking lunch breaks is a way to develop self-respect and self-worth. You are worthy of time off to eat a lovely sandwich and think about daffodils! Sometimes, we all feel like we’re not “allowed” to rest, that it has to be hard and we have to suffer for it to be worth it. Sometimes, we measure our productivity on how much we sacrificed to get there. You don’t have to suffer or sacrifice downtime to be successful.

And you don’t have to wait until you magically believe you’re worth it to start taking breaks and looking after yourself. Start taking them, and the belief will start to follow. You’ll be sending yourself the message that you deserve to be cared for, and so you’ll start to feel it, too.

Maybe 2 hours is a big ask for you, but try 20 minutes at least. I dare you!

Here are some ideas:

Leave the building. Physically remove yourself from work to clear your head and refresh you body and brain.
Breathe deeply. Follow a guided meditation, or simply take big, deep breaths by yourself.
Plan delicious lunches. If you have something to look forward to, surely you’ll want to sit and savour it?
Turn off all screens. You want to be present in your break, so limit the distractions that could pull you back into work.
Get a dog or borrow someone else’s. Dog-walking is great, because you can concentrate on something else, and you have a moral obligation to take a break! Plus, y’know, cute.

Have a wonderful bank holiday weekend!

PS If you’re still thinking ‘Yeah, right, how unrealistic, there’s no way I could do that, it’ll ruin my business’, I’M TALKING TO YOU. Go back to the beginning, read again. Or email me and tell me exactly how taking 20 minutes off every day is going to ruin your business.

My first retreat

I find Cliff House quite easily. I’d been studying the map for weeks (probably months) and felt like I knew all the landmarks by heart. I pull in, and it feels like the clouds part.

I get out of the car, and let myself into this beautiful Victorian house, which is – fortunately – everything I had hoped for. I walk through the hallway, into the dining room and through to the kitchen. It’s in there that I do a little jump up and down, starting to feel the bubbles of excitement for what this weekend is going to be.

My sister arrives shortly afterwards, which ramps up the excitement. She and Ross are almost as amazed as I am that this is our home for the next few days.

We walk round everywhere, getting lost and confused a few times. Holly and Lara arrive, and after that, guests arrive in fits and starts. Every time someone new arrives, I feel the excitement all over again.

There are introductions, squeals, hugs, so much chatter. As evening comes in, there’s Prosecco, and then dinner is served. The food is good. The wine is good. Both are better than I had hoped.

Everything’s pretty smooth so far, but I’m nervous for the next bit. For the opening ceremony. This is where I show them what it’s going to be like, here on this retreat. I’m going to introduce some concepts, and I’m going to lead a meditation. Are they going to go for it? Will I be able to calm my nerves to do it?

And there are some hesitations, but everyone sinks into this new way of being – a different kind of workspace.

We start to relax in a way we haven’t in a long time.

Every moment starts to get longer, and suddenly it feels like we have so much time.

***

I’ve been trying to find some words to explain what the retreat was like, for me and for my guests. It’s taken a while (unusual for me – I like the words). The retreat weekend was more than words, more than output, more than problem-solving.

It was a feeling.

Last week, I looked back through my notes of how I wanted guests to feel at the end of the retreat, and my notes say: seen and heard, supported, allowed to thrive, nourished, clear, well rested.

Yes, that’s what I wanted. And that’s what happened.

It’s easy to forget that being well rested, really relaxing and letting go of the brain clutter, can allow you to open up to new ideas, to what you really want. That’s what we did.

And on Saturday afternoon, as guests were going for massages and making moodboards, it felt like we’d been there a week. We’d been there 24 hours.

The messages I’ve received then and since have been wonderful, tear-inducing things. I know that the retreat made a difference to everyone who came, and it’s amazing seeing how much people have achieved in just over a week since they got home! That’s what clarity does, I guess.

But it’s also changed how I’m looking at my business. This is the work I really want to do – working with small business owners holistically, talking to them as people as well as businesses. Not just at retreats, perhaps, but acknowledging what we believe and how we feel as people can drastically effect our work as businesses.

Yes to that. And yes to more of this work for me.

Here’s the thing

Here’s the thing…

Enter The Forge