Every Friday I post a “here’s the thing” blog. “Here’s the thing” is something my mum (and many other wise people) like to say when they’re about to make a good point. Hopefully these posts are also good points.

Can you feel the autumn air creeping in? Maybe you’re trying to hold on to the summer for just a little longer. Maybe you’ve been saying, ‘Eee, the nights are drawing in’ with a sharp intake of breath since 22^nd July. (Hi, mum.)

Right now, we’re on the cusp. We can feel it coming, but it’s not quite here yet. The sun could still come out for an Indian summer. We still have time to enjoy the last shimmers of light on the horizon.

For me, the shift into autumn makes me want to write essays about poetry (especially the works and lives of T S Eliot and e e cummings), and read All The Books. Preferably in New England surrounded by orange trees.

In reality, I buy knitwear, stationery and thick socks. I start thinking about soups and stews and things made with carrots. I still read All The Books.

Perhaps for you there is a genuine back to school feeling – by this time next week, your child(ren) will be back to a routine, or starting a new routine, and they’ll be out from under your feet. I know for a lot of small business owners who are also parents, there’s a sigh of relief. Because while you love your children, you also crave routine and time to run your business.

Whether you have kids or not, this “new term” will be big for your business. For the majority of small businesses I work with, Christmas is the busiest time of year, and while you’ve already been planning and preparing, September is when it all starts becoming very real.

And if we were all in a room together right now, I’d ask you to raise your hand if that seems quite scary, and the vast majority of the audience would wave at me. Some would look terrified, some sheepish, and some would look a bit jaded like they’ve done it a million times (but still worry).

I know there’s still stock to order, temporary staff to recruit, product descriptions and photos to finish, lists to make, and work space to prepare.

I know cash flow is tight, and trade shows are coming up, and there’s a vague sense of dread about long days and not enough sleep.

But right now, while it’s still August and there’s still light past 6 o’clock, let’s not wish our lives away. Let’s savour these last summer moments, and look forward to the first thrills of autumn. In many ways, we still reap the harvest during these next few months. It’s just not really from the fields these days…

So here’s the thing:

There are nearly three full days before September. I promise, on Monday, you’ll be able to make all your lists and preparations and worry about Christmas and staff and stock.

Before then, let’s celebrate!

What was your favourite bit about summer 2014? Which moments do you want to remember? Write them down, look through your photographs. Put something awesome together that you’ll love to look at later.

How could you celebrate this transition and welcome in the new season? A special dinner with your friends, kids and/or other half? A last barbeque perhaps? Even if it’s just savouring a cold lemonade or summer-y drink for the next-to-last time, there’s something beautiful and meaningful in marking a shift between old and new.

Which nice things about autumn are you looking forward to? Are you planning a new stationery collection or wardrobe? I totally made a Pinterest board of lovely autumn scenes to remind myself of how beautiful the world gets in October. Find positive things to look forward to, rather than just getting stuck in the worries and panics.

This weekend is perfect for one or two little celebrations and positive thoughts before we actually reach September. Whatever you’re doing, I hope you enjoy it!

 

PS I’m working on a little e-course to support you through the busiest weeks of the year. I can’t WAIT to share it with you! Keep your eyes peeled in the next few weeks.

Every Friday I post a “here’s the thing” blog. “Here’s the thing” is something my mum (and many other wise people) like to say when they’re about to make a good point. Hopefully these posts are also good points.

Getting feedback on products, orders, services, social media posts, photos and, y’know, everything is really important for businesses. Do customers like it? Does your mum like it? Is there anything that could be better? Why would they buy it? Why wouldn’t they buy it? Do they think it’s a 5 out of 10 or an 8 out of 10?

Knowing about people’s experiences can help you to streamline and develop your business for the better.

And when people love your stuff, it’s really, really uplifting. You remember what you’ve always known but sometimes forget: that this is what you love to do, what you’re meant to do, what you’ve worked really hard to be able to do.

Woohoo!

Negative feedback. Oh, the pain.

You worked really hard to create something that’s kind of part of you. You made it. It came from your brain, via your hands, into the world. And they don’t like it. They think it’s too expensive, or too flimsy, or too small, or it was delivered later than they expected. They don’t like the colour.

Or, as I heard from a friend recently, their boyfriend didn’t like the envelope. (Please, get a grip.)

And out of the thousands of customers who are happy, delighted, ecstatic or just quietly content (because that’s great too), you remember the handful of negative comments.

Why? And how do you get rid of it?

We’re genetically, evolutionarily* programmed to receive feedback and moderate behaviour based on it. We do it as kids, and it’s how we learn to read and write and exist with fellow human beings. You get corrected on your spelling, and you learn from it. You burp at the table, get told off, and you learn from it.

As a species, it’s really important that we please our tribe so they don’t throw us out on our own, where we’ll die via lions and tigers and bears (oh my!).

And when you’re a creative business, a solopreneur, that’s terrifying. You’ve built a tribe of customers who aren’t obligated to like you (they’re not your mum) and you’ve got them to buy something from you, and you get really excited about building this group of brilliant people who get you, get your craft, get your products and then… Damn. They don’t like it. They don’t like it as much as you want them to like it.

You worry. You worry that everyone will think the same as them. You equate one person’s opinion with eternal truth. You lose perspective. Your evolutionary brain is telling you to moderate your behaviour. Change everything about your business to please everyone. And it gets angry, because your safety is threatened. Or it breaks down and tries to hide from the truth, because fight or flight is a real thing that happens every day.

And I know. I’ve been there. In two months, I’ve had one person say something I’ve offered is too expensive. That’s one person versus the eight mentoring clients and 20+ other clients I’ve worked with, who are happy and grateful and value what I do. (Hi guys, love you.)

And it got me. I had to walk around the flat physically trying to shake the feeling off me. Had I missed the mark? Should I not have offered it? Was I barking up the wrong tree?

No. Perspective. A service that offers value and, well, service. 28+ clients. In two months. And the realisation that I can’t please everyone. And that I don’t want to.

So here’s the thing:

Negative feedback happens, especially as your business grows and you get more customers. Because a wider pool of customers means a higher risk of crazy people or people who don’t get it or people who value other stuff to you.

First step: Is it actually true? If the order to negative ratio is more than, say, 10%, you might need to consider whether you’ve got a quality issue or room-for-improvement value proposition. No biggie. Roll with it. Call me. You can deal with it.

Second step: Perspective. Opinion is not fact. One person’s preference for envelopes doesn’t make yours crap. One person’s ridiculously high expectation doesn’t mean you have to match it.

Third step: Get it out. Tell someone. Rant about it. Let it go. Write it down and set fire to it. Whatever it takes to get it out of your head.

It’s your job to put a great product out there, with a fair price, with clear expectations, and then deliver on it. It’s also your job to take constructive criticism and consider whether feedback would make your product and service better. It’s their job to understand the product, accept the limitations and nature of the product, and receive it.

It is not your job to succumb to every whim of every weirdo who didn’t get it.

As Brené Brown (there she is again) says, “Don’t try to win over the haters; you are not the jackass whisperer.”

 

*I wasn’t sure evolutionarily was a word, but it totally is and I learned something today.